Monday, September 28, 2009

i wonder...

{via: flickr.}

sometimes i wonder how one day can be absolutely happy for no particular reason.
i wonder why some days our hearts are far more tender than normal. i wonder how people can say such disheartening things. i wonder if maybe i have done something to make someone else sad. i wonder what people are thinking about in their hearts as they go about their daily lives.

perhaps the girl reading flashcards on the bus is suffering from a newly broken heart- the boy across the aisle in class, who stares ahead so very intently, maybe his mind is running non-stop with about fears of losing his ill grandfather-- & maybe the shy girl in the front row, who takes diligent notes, is really about to explode with excitement over a wonderful date from the night before...
people hide so much from the world, i think we all do.


i wonder how sometimes i can be laughing about something so very silly & within the next minute be brought to tears from something which hurts my heart so. & then there are days in which nothing seems to be going right & you wonder if you were naive for having woken up with a feeling of hope for the day. the day which later would slowly prove to be a day of disappointments.

today i became very discouraged. i wondered how much my life would be impacted by a low grade on a single test, or the fact that i forgot one little assignment.
then i realized:
it can matter for the moment, but i won't let it sour my overall feelings.
i will be sad. i will feel disappointed...but at the end of the day i must dust myself off, get up off the ground, and let the world know that i will sometimes fail.

but my failures will only make me wiser, make me stronger, make me me.


xo-
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11 comments:

  1. Wow, very intense lady. Maybe it's just me but this really hit me...possibly because it relates to my most recent post and it's causing quite a bit of anxiety in my life.

    Thanks for the perspective. :)

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  2. This post has somehow brought to mind this quote by Groucho Marx:

    "Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light."

    A thoughtful, meaningful post. Thank you for this.
    Life's a strange thing, pulling us in all sorts of directions on a daily basis. It's part of being human that we experience these things, but as you said...though the tougher moments may linger, when we eventually rise above them the strength we gain is great.
    Keep smiling!

    xx

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  3. I love your post today. What you said is so true. I realized this about two years ago, but still have problems practicing it.

    Nobody's life is perfect, but I think we often decide to see someone's life as perfect because we see the holes in ours. Happiness is a decision, and a failed test or a broken heart shouldn't determine our outlook forever, especially once we've given ourselves time to heal. And when we emerge from our problems, we sometimes a more complete version of ourselves. You are so good to remind everyone.

    You are just a doll.
    I love it.

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  4. Very touching...it's feeling like those that makes us human.

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  5. Anna,
    This is so perfectly 'Anna'! What truth! You amaze me sometimes, girl. You know how this complex machine works. And you really have a handle on the wheel. You're an artist that really grows every day! I love to read your blog, Anna. You inspire me! Grace. I see you learning to handle life with grace.

    Mrs. Mitchell
    (I am 'anonymous' b/c I'm such a freaking neophyte at this computer stuff & that's the only label I can make work....)

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  6. Anna, I love this! It's really wonderful and encouraging. Thank you for who you are.

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  7. What a beautiful and honest post. You put into words feelings I know I have on occasion.

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  8. Oh, my darling, how true. There are things that have happened in life which, at the time, were all consuming, horrific and seemingly never ending. Yet, here I am, happy, without too much to worry about and I'd have to delve to find the bad things. :O)

    x

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  9. You've just given me a wonderful idea. DO things as I normally do...but as soon as I notice my mind wandering...jot down what I was thinking while I was doing something completely unrelated. THEN you may have insight...at least to me. :)

    You are right that a low grade will not follow you. The anger over it may linger (for nearly 14 years...that's neither here nor there though)....but it won't be a main character in your future. :) I know from experience.

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